Bowie, Can you Rreeaaad Me?

I seem to be having a bit of an image-posting problem at the moment!  I tend to not want to post if I don't have pictures, but pictures be damned!  Here we go.

I recently received a very nice comment from reader Alya, who suggested I write more posts like this one.  I have to admit that it may be the first time any one has directly told me, "I like this, do more of it."

So I'd like to pose the question to all of you, and I would love, love, love to hear from each and every one of you so I can understand exactly why you come and read!  If you've been reading a while, you'll know there are some types of posts that I've drifted away from, such as the "here is a theoretically cool outfit" post and "here are 5 dresses I like that adhere to a price-point/theme" and also "listen to this/watch this video", mostly because they didn't generate as many comments as straight outfit posts, but I'd like to know exactly what you guys come here for so that I can use your thoughts as my blogging compass.

Thank you in advance,

Elissa.

UGH! Or, the story of why I never buy anything online.

Why should it be that one of my all-time favorite brands is one which I rarely ever buy anything from?  Oh yes-- that's it-- because it's J.Crew and I'm a chickadee of simple means.  But, I got in my email box today a notice that all sale items were an additional 30% off until midnight, so I gamely picked out a few things, then deleted almost all of them from my cart except for these lovely Tretorns...

The white rubber and gold-inflected canvas are perfect for summer anything, and at the "sale on sale" price, only $38.  OK.  Then, my interfering mind chimed in.  It said, "Do you really need more shoes?"  "Can you find something more practical to spend $38 on?"  "You've never even seen these shoes before, and there are some that you have been wanting for longer.  As long as you're venturing to spend $38, why not put it towards something you've actually been wanting?"

The shoes I've been wanting are another pair of Toms... During the 2008 election, I did a lot of work for the Campaign for Change, and found it meet to show my political proclivities with a pair of natural canvas Toms that said "Vote" on one shoe, and had a graphic of a donkey on the other.  Now that the election is over (I think it was my shoes that swung the vote), it seems silly to wear them around now.  I haven't until recently, when I found them under the couch and decided to try them on again.  I took them on a walk around the neighborhood.  These are damn comfortable shoes, readers, better than flip-flops.  Having examined it from every angle, there really is no way to resurrect this dated style, and so a new pair of Toms is in order.

Behold, the burlap pair.  I love solid colors that are highly textured, and this definitely fits the bill.  But, I did read some bad reviews about the burlap coming apart, and then I decided to look into getting the natural canvas pair (none in my size) or the gray pair (is gray a falling star in the color-trends world yet?) or the blue pair (too mannish) or the red pair (not versatile enough).  I returned to the Tretorns.

But wait!  I thought-- I have a gift card to Urban Outfitters.  Maybe they carry Toms?  Or maybe they have some slip-ons that would be just as cute as the ones my friend has with whales all over them?  Yes, Virginia, they do!

They're the right color, and they have this amazing deer print on them.  God knows I'm a sucker for deer.  Plus, I'm going on vacation soon with a few friends, one of them has a pathological fear of deer.  I could wear the shoes and it would be a hilarious joke for us all to enjoy, and I could terrorize her with them all week long.  And then again, my annoying inner voice said, "But aren't deer more like a Christmas thing?"  "Is this too tongue-in-cheek?"  "Tretorns are so classy.  These.... aren't." 

So I returned to the Tretorns.  But they have laces, I thought... I love the appeal of just throwing ones shoes on as you skip out of your bungalow down the pier.  But Tretorns are sexy.  I returned to the Tretorns.  I pried my credit card out of my wallet, all the time saying, "Hm... this is a week's worth of parking and two really good lunches worth of shoes."  I entered my information.  I entered the coupon code.  And then--- what the what??? I was timed out of my session!  I frantically re-did the whole process, only to find that by the time I got to the checkout, the coupon code had expired, and the shoes were no longer $38 with free shipping, but now $55.  And as long as they're $55, I may as well buy a pair of Toms and use a $5 off coupon code from RetailMeNot.  Or maybe I'll just use my gift card to Urban Outfitters.  Or maybe I'll just see if I can be happy with what I already have....

AKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Anyone else have these problems???

Yours,

Elissa.

Little floral skirt.

Shirt:  TJ Maxx.  Everything else:  Thrifted.

Today is the first time I've tried to "work-ify" this skirt; scandalous? Maybe.  The slightest updraft is dangerous, indeed, as is the slight sheerness to the skirt.  Couple that with the fact that my shoes are dying a hideous, awful death and this outfit veers perilously close to FML territory.  However, things remained in balance and the breezy skirt felt summery, casual and cheerful, and the flat shoes kept things from getting too slutty.  Let's take a moment and honor the last wearing of these shoes...

Here are a few other ways in which I've worn this skirt: 

With blacks and grays, very austere...

Hm... very similar actually!  Looks like I enjoy pairing this belt with this skirt...

Mixing patterns up... I ended up giving this necklace to a friend.  I hope she loves it!  I'm missing it, looking at it now...

Yours,

Elissa.

What's goin' on.

I feel bad.  I haven't had as much time lately to devote to blogging, and I feel like I'm wasting something or letting somebody down-- but what I'm wasting and whom I'm letting down are unclear.

I'm at a strange point right now.  I had an interview last week for a position that by all rights is just the thing that I have been trying to do since I graduated last year-- being a merchant.  But I went in, this time, with the mentality that I was also interviewing this place of work-- I wasn't just being interviewed by them.  They described a work environment that seemed stressful and overwhelming-- when I asked what a typical day's hours were, there was no definitive answer.  One of the interviewers said she had even once worked a 23-hour day.  Technically, they said, a work day should be 8:30-6pm, but that was more theory than practice. 

This place was also a 45-minute commute from home.  I didn't consider this lightly.  For the first time in my life, I pre-emptively rejected the position; and not just any position, but one I've been angling for, for like, forever.  I know myself, and I know that having a work life that supercedes all other aspects of one's life whittles me down fast.  No matter what it is that I'm doing, I need relief from doing it; and if I'm not in control of when I come or go, I get ants in my pants.  And not cute picnic ants, but red, fire-breathing, corpse-munching ants.

I wrote the interviewers an email and let them know that the position wasn't in line with my desire for balance in my life, but the chapter isn't completely closed for me.  Sometimes I'm afraid that the rabid squirrel in my brain that is ADD sabotaged me.  Maybe I wouldn't have such a need for "quiet time" if I were properly medicated.  Maybe I would have taken the long view and said, "Screw it, I'm going in.  There's health insurance and some more money and maybe some choice promotions at the end of this road."  Maybe, maybe, maybe.

But, I am of the opinion that most things happen for a reason... and besides, this didn't "happen", I chose it.  And I did have my reasons.  I just hope that there's something out there in the fashion universe for me to do that doesn't involve working constantly around the clock (as it seems most positions do), or maybe there's something else out there for me to do that I wouldn't mind working constantly around the clock, and all other things would just naturally fall into place around it.

We'll see.  For now, I'm running late to see and possibly participate in an open-mike, different venue this time.

Yours,

Elissa.

Pussy bow fever.

All day long, I thought, "Somebody, please ask me what this thing on my neck is, please!!"  I was so desperate to blithely inform them, "Pussy bow."  "Take a look at my giant pussy bow, boys.  Matter of fact, take a picture cuz the pussy bow don't hang around forever."

Shirt:  thrifted.  Skirt:  Target.  Shoes:  Steve Madden.  Belt:  Victoria's Secret.  Scarf:  Found on the street!  Shades:  80spurple. 

This look evolved out of some laziness.  I woke up, feeling like putting on clothes was the very last thing I wanted out of life.  But, I decided the closest thing might be to just wear a chambray chirt and a khaki skhirt.  Alone, they might give off a casual, American flair, I thought.  I was wrong.  I riffled through the drawers to come up with some black to add zing to an otherwise Wal-marty palette.

What can I say?  I added the sunglasses, and I felt all prowly and whatnots.  For having thrown together some rather disparate elements-- khaki skirt, patent belt, untucked shirt, lizard shoes, the end result felt quite alright. 

Til later,

Elissa.

Shady!!

Heeeerreeees Johnny!

Shirt: TJ Maxx.  Tiered Skirt:  TJ Maxx.  Shoes:  JC Penney.  Sunglasses:  80spurple.

What the hell?  Why yes, these are the third pair of sunglasses that I sprung for on a dark and stormy night.  As some comedian other than myself once said, it's nice sometimes, to shop online on a head full of wine, because, come a few days later, your mailbox is full of mystery presents you forgot were coming to ya.

Score!  I'm loving these, and I love to flip them up on people instead of guilelessly removing them from my face.  You see, these sunglasses have evolved.  Speaking of "score!" and "evolved", I'm happy to say that this entire look, head to toe, was $46. 

I broke.

Also speaking of "evolving", the guy who runs a sketch comedy group in town has asked if I would write a skit for the show... I'm super flattered and pumped as hell--- visions of skits revolving around texting while driving, super-annoying cats and Bombshell McGee are floating through my head-- if it could be said that a skinhead chick with a neck tattoo floats through one's head.

And now, off to cogitate...

Yours,

Elissa.

Nailed.

Nothing makes me feel "prepared" quite like having my nails done.  I have to be prepared for this week, so I set out to the nearest nail place, armed with a bottle of orange polish. 

 OPI In My Back Pocket, Espadrilles:  Colin Stuart.

Finding none of the usual joints open on a Sunday, I passed a Wal-Mart that happened to have a nail place in it, and decided to see if a) it was open, b) if it was cheap, and c) if it might be the place to go in the future.  Well, it was open and it was cheap.  As for condition C?  I have never had such a painful and traumatic nail experience.  I feel like a POW.  I was too shocked by the situation to think about asking not to pay for it (and also I didn't want to embarrass the guy, who otherwise was friendly and nice), but damn.  I need to go back there and say something, because even now it still hurts, and I can't have it interfering with my game...!  I just joined an Ultimate Frisbee league and I have a game tomorrow... I need all fingers present and accounted for!

Have you ever had a bad salon experience?? What did you do about it?

Yours,

Elissa.

Jerry Orbach can wait, I have presents from the thrift store.

I can't say that I "don't do pants", but for someone who lives in Columbus, OH --home to both Abercrombie jeans, Express jeans, and Midwestern people-- it could be said that I don't do pants.

Timex bag:  Target via Grandview Weekend Outlet.  Scarf:  Thrifted.  Jacket:  Macy's.  Tank:  Urban Outfitters.  Pants:  Old Navy.  Shoes:  JC Penney.

Today, I do pants.  The last time I wore black flares was in 2001, when I went on a trip to England and-- for versatility's sake and ease of packing, the only bottoms I bought were a pair of stretchy black flares (shudder) and a pair of UFO pants-- silver.  The rave scene came late to my corner of the universe, and by the time I got to the U.K., I could do some glow-stick poi that could blow your mind-- if anyone there wasn't so past 1995.  I'll have to dig those pictures up, if I can find any where I'm not being obscene.... Americans.

Nowadays, my black flares are crafted of the finest denim Old Navy has to offer in their clearance department, and they are perfect for days when I wake up, look at the alarm clock, and say-- how can I be washed and decently non-naked in the next 6 minutes? Time crunches, my friends.

I really have to remember not to eat seafood anymore.  The last several times I have, I've become violently ill, and yet it's siren song lures me to its lurid pleasures every time I dry back out.  Last night, after I performed (once again), I sought late-night refuge in some leftover soup from the Thai place... leftover seafood soup.  The first half of today was wobbly to say the least. 

As soon as I arrived home, I jumped in the chair and flipped on Law & Order.  My sweetness pulled into the driveway and said, "Jerry Orbach can wait.  I have surprises from the thrift store."  Behold:

A needlepoint JFK  in a scrolly frame... I can definitely picture my mom having this on her wall as a teenager!  Although needlecraft is not necessarily the domain of those between the ages of 11 and 80... Who do you think had this on their wall?

The sweetest bag of all time!!!  I'm only mildly into astrology as a practice, but as a decorative motif, I am bananas.  If it's zodiac-related, I'm hooked.  Couple that with the "Love is..." style art, collage-y look, unconventional wording and the fact that my own little sign is right on top, I am smitten...

Here's a wider shot of the bag... we've got Cancer, Virgo and Aries here... oh my sweetness and his fancy taste!!

Til next time,

Yours,

Elissa.

Shoes, pills, eagles.

Vest:  H&M in Amsterdam.  Dress:  Forever 21.  Bag:  Thrifted.  Shoes:  Nine West.  Cuff:  Cedar Point.

I received a nice compliment today from the Fed Ex guy, who has told me that every day-- when our paths intersect as I go across the street for a coffee-- he notices my shoes.  Any trace of incredulity in my mind was assuaged as he began to rattle off my shoes:  "The gold ones that lace, the ones that have lions on them, the silver sandals with seahorses..." Amazing!  Or weird, depending which Flickr groups you belong to.

It's just the nature of the beast that accessories are cheaper than clothes-- well, my beast.  Yours might be different.  Part of my problem is I don't like to buy inexpensive clothing because it never fits (except at Forever 21... curious...), so I buy clothes almost never.  Therefore, I always find that the most interesting part of my get-up is typically the accessories, but I don't really devote many photos to them-- I think it embarasses me to put my stuff "under the microscope".  Ah well... voila the second of my three pairs of sunglasses.... the still catty, though less markedly so, tortoiseshell pair.

Shades:  80spurple.  Ring:  Target

The ring is clear acrylic (one of my favorite ring-types) filled with what looks like pills.  I love the pukey pink color and the subversiveness of its contents.  Not shown, due to my non-microscopic tendencies, is my cuff which I got at Cedar Point, an amusement park near here, when I was 12.  It's tooled with a U.S. flag and an eagle, and looks pretty bad-ass.  I'm patriotic only in the most spiritual of senses (maybe a topic for later discussion?), but I do love American symbols-- what's to hate about a good star spangling?  Though wearing them is another topic entirely, and one usually met by derision-- seriously.  Gauge how you feel next time you pass someone wearing a shirt with an American flag on it.  But having it on my little cuff is kind of low-key and possibly subversive as well.  And if anyone asks, I have a pet eagle.

Til later,

Elissa.

Case of the Confounding Dress

Dress:  Banana Republic.  Shoes:  Steve Madden.  Shades:  80s Purple.

I don't know what it is with this dress.  It and I have a confounding relationship.  It was actually picked out for me by my Sweetness, and-- as the compliments that flow from him whenever I wear it would lead me to believe-- it's probably my best look evarrr.  But the thing is like a hologram.  I love the color, and in front of the mirror at home, it's a-ok.  But throughout the day, I'll catch myself in reflections and the frumptastic, overly-boobish, pooch-exemplifying nature of this dress flashes maliciously back at me.  In fact, as I was driving home, I thought-- that's it!  This thing is going straight to Goodwill.  I'll take outfit photos and entitle my blog post RIP Nightmare Dress.  Then I took a couple of photos and thought-- eh, this thing isn't so bad!  Maybe I judged too quickly!  And that is the ordeal I go through every time I wear this dress.

Probably it's because it's out of my normal range of thing-wearing, in that it ties further up than I'm accustomed, highlighting the girls, which typically I try to keep as streamlined as possible.  Also, I kind of hate jersey for its clingy properties, and typically go for wovens.  So maybe, if I put Sal-like logic to the problem, it doesn't matter what I actually look like in it-- its outside of my boundaries in a way that makes me not feel my best when I wear it.  So I toss it out on its ear.

Something that is going right today??

Hot shades!

These Wang-esque cat-eye shades.  The other night, I was paralyzed in front of the computer with 4 pairs of sunglasses in my shopping cart, but with 2 sunglasses worth in my Paypal.  None of the pairs would budge and I resigned myself to the sad thought that I may, in fact, just bite the bullet and buy 4 pairs of sunglasses.  When, lo and behold, an Etsy order came in right at the moment for the exact amount of all 4 and the "buy" button was gleefully clicked-- though not without finally ruling out one pair.  I don't know about you, but it's easier for me to not spend money when I actually have some.  Hmph!  So this is the first of three-- I can't wait to present them all to you in moving photo-essay format...

Til then,

Elissa.

Exhausted!

Let's take a break and indulge in some cat porn.  Why?  In short, I am mega tired and have my fingers in too many pies at the moment.  Writing is how I like to unwind, so it annoys me that I don't even have time to do that-- I'm looking at the clock going--- mmm okay, that's 5 hours and 34 minutes of sleep, if I don't take a shower...

So while I figure out some good ways to sleep while awake, let's meditate on my own little kitty here, so very good at what she does. 

Maybe "cat porn" should be a regular feature...

I just got a box full of all the sunglasses of my fantasies, so expect to see them on me shortly, oh so shortly.

Yours,

Elissa.