Today's Pin!

I like to imagine I'm the Emily Post of Halloween.

I once said to a young man, "Halloween is my very favorite holiday." To which, in reply, he said, "Yes, Halloween is when girls dress slutty."

Cringe! Cover your Goblin! The only thing scary about these costumes is the overexposure of vaj and boobs--- and that's downright sexist when you think about it...

Yes, it is. Why? Because we live in a sexually repressed society where our inner slutitude can only be expressed on the one day of the year where people get to be something they're not.

This "dog as iPhone" is actually a rather clever waitress from Long Island City.

I say, goddamn it, we all know we're sexy betches, Halloween costumes should be grotesque, farcical or at least a convincing fake of something else (I was once an extremely convincing whigger for Halloween... these are the things you do when you grow up in Cincinnati).

Grotesque, frightening, and convincing!

Last year, my "Pregnant Britney Spears" costume was a huge success, and I'm having trouble deciding what to be this year. I'm thinking either...

"Lil Baby Sass" from "The Pick of Destiny"... need I say more?

Cheap, and awesome: wear a nude unitard and draw eyes on your hands.

Tangentially related to the eyeless monster, though not a reference to last year's movies, a bunch of grapes.

I've always wanted to be a bunch of grapes as a costume; it's a good excuse to buy purple tights and cover yourself in balloons. Also, the threat of having your balloons popped and revealing your "stem" is sexy in its own right, but in more of a "potential" kind of a way, not in a "Hey get out of my bedrooom, I'm about to do effin', oh wait, I'm on the street" kinda way. I think that going all the way and filling the balloons with a little bit of wine, just so that they couldn't say I didn't think of everything.

And here, for your viewing pleasure, a few old-timey costumes with modern appeal. This first one makes me want to get it blown up and printed out, poster size.

"The humans are dead."

I could rock the crap out of that onion costume...for extra effect-- and to make your costume not just a sight gag, but also a smell one, one could consume a bag of Funyuns before hitting the evening's parties.

So... have you thought about what you want to be for Halloween? If not, think now... I'm announcing a Halloween-themed contest soon!

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Pin o' the Day

According to my hurried, distracted count over chicken noodle soup at lunch today, there are 20 tiny little days until we all decide "who's on first". To count us down, I'll present you with the "Pin of the Day".





...Because I would rather drink Drano before I see my country run by Calamity McCain.

Insert Fashion-Related Fencing Pun (En Garters? ) Here.

So, I'm taking Fencing this quarter; partly because I'm into theater and think that knowing how to fence will help me land a plumb Shakespeare role one day (if I pull a Gwyneth Paltrow, I guess), and partly because it looks so frickin' awesome. The outfits bring to mind a more elegant, and French "A Clockwork Orange". A couple days ago, I went to a fencing competition to see my few, stilted skills brought to life by those in the know. And to look at their uniforms.


Ahh... the vests, oh, the vests! Can't resist an outfit with a vestigial codpiece. White, gold, and metallic baby pink seemed to be the protocol.


Some regulation style fencing shoes which were reasonably cool in their own right. Most of the fencers, however, were wearing Aasics Mexico 66's....mmm... aasics...


Most of the competitors were wearing these new, clear-faced masks. Sleek, however, it diminishes the kinky thrill of the traditional ones.


I deemed this girl to be the fashionista of the bunch--- due to the socks and bitchin' shoes.

---And now, time for a little Ultraviolence.


Arrgh!


Parry, damnit!


Ga-zzing!


Behold, my fencing/Stanley Kubric film, concept-uniting Polyvore.


A clockwork neutral by spandexpony


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On me today...

It's been a very workish day for me... first, at the CD store, where the highlight of my day was hearing some new TV on the Radio (and trust, it was one hell of a highlight when everyone wants to listen to screamy hardcore and you have a head-liquefying hangover!)


Sweater: Victoria's Secret. Dress: Forever 21. Tights: Thrifted. Shoes: thrifted. Bangle: H&M.

...Then the rest of the day was devoted to my "Katharine Hepburn Visits Falling Water on an Autumn Day to Pen a Book Deal/Prepare a Flowchart/Attend a Team-Building Seminar" collection of workwear. Below is my inspiration collage...



... oh... but the shoes... I know, not very Hepburn-y but we're not trying to take it all the way. Just a taste. Large, square shoulders and trousers and things. And languid pragmatism. Dig those slouchy socks!

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Puttin' the "age" in "vintage", the "old" in "old navy", the "seasoning" in "Mrs. Dash".

In high school, I worked in the dining facilities of a retirement community. It was one of the most amazing job experiences I've ever had... First, there was Paul, who refused to show anyone his arms. I learned why when I delivered dinner to his room one night when he wasn't feeling well enough to come down to the dining room. He answered the door in his "underwear" (a wifebeater), because he was expecting the usual male food deliverer, and was completely mortified that I was exposed to all of the WWII pin-up girls tattooed all up and down his arms. Then there was Edith, who was charming, lighthearted, and of very simple tastes, and if you asked her to, even though she barely could, she would show you the Charleston that people in her neighborhood used to pay her to see. One of my very favorites, Bessie, celebrated her 111th birthday in the dining room with near the same number of close friends and relatives. Her mother had been a slave; a fact which both made Bessie seem extraordinarily old, but also made the barbarous practice seem extraordinarily recent.

So, when I found out about the blog Advanced Style, you can understand why I went completely over the moon for it. In pictures, the reasons why Advanced Style is lovely, amazing, the bees' knees and a complete inspiration (and the next recipient of B'love).